While looking at a website for liposuction, I learned that it was a six-to eight-week recovery period, the clincher being that, during that time, I would under no circumstances be able to use street drugs. Obviously I had to think of a more realistic approach.

Chelsea Handler
About This Quote

Even though she did not go operating on herself, Lisa was taking a serious look at the liposuction procedure. She wanted to get rid of the fat in her body, but she did not want to put herself in danger or have to stop using cocaine. So, she did some research to see what other options were available.

Source: Are You There, Vodka? Its Me, Chelsea

Some Similar Quotes
  1. I have something I need to tell you, " he says. I run my fingers along the tendons in his hands and look back at him. "I might be in love with you." He smiles a little. "I'm waiting until I'm sure to tell you,... - Veronica Roth
  2. I love you like a fat kid loves cake! - Scott Adams
  3. Love can change a person the way a parent can change a baby- awkwardly, and often with a great deal of mess. - Lemony Snicket
  4. When God Created Mothers"When the Good Lord was creating mothers, He was into His sixth day of "overtime" when the angel appeared and said. "You're doing a lot of fiddling around on this one." And God said, "Have you read the specs on this order?"... - Erma Bombeck
  5. And next time you're planning to injure yourself to get me attention, just remember that a little sweet talk works wonders. - Cassandra Clare
More Quotes By Chelsea Handler
  1. There are two kinds of people I don't trust: people who don't drink and people who collect stickers.
  2. Obviously, if I was serious about having a relationship with someone long-term, the last people I would introduce him to would be my family.
  3. Are you there vodka? It's me, Chelsea. Please get me out of jail and I promise I will never drink again. Drink and drive. I will never drink and drive again. I may even start my own group fashioned after MADD, Mothers Against Drunk Driving,...
  4. My mother told me that life isn't always about pleasing yourself and that sometimes you have to do things for the sole benefit of another human being. I completely agreed with her, but reminded her that that was what blow jobs were for.
  5. Men don’t realize that if we’re sleeping with them on the first date, we’re probably not interested in seeing them again either.
Related Topics